If You Like It Then You Need To Put A Ring On It

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“If you liked then you shoulda put a ring on it”. Beyonce’ had to know she had a hit when she put this song out. “If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it”, and as women, we should really take heed to the lyrics. No not the part about being up in the club or crying tears for three long years, no not that part; that is the part we need to avoid. Besides, we have been through that part, doing things for a man; washing his clothes, cooking his food, playing mama to his children only to have a relationship that lasts for a year or maybe three end and it seems that time was wasted.

But, every moment led up to this moment, if you find that the prior paragraph is the story of your life then my dear you need to create a new story line; the new theme being “if you like it then you need to put a ring on it”. I mean come on ladies, how long will we sit down and tolerate playing wife but not actually being his wife only to have him wind up marrying someone else?

I understand that courtship and dating are necessary to understand if the man you are interested in is even worth your hand in marriage, just as he needs to evaluate the same thing. So for some, during this time, the woman may cook a meal, she may discipline his children, or take care of him while he’s sick. All of this is fine and dandy- really it is- the first two or three times. After all how many meals does it take for a man to find out you are able to nurture his body as well as his spirit? How many times must you discipline lil Jamal before he understands that you also know how to hold your own in the mothering department? How many times must you bring him chicken noodle soup, get him to take vitamin C, and rub Vicks on his chest before he sees that you are capable in-more ways than one-to take care of and nurture him and the family that you may have together in the future? HOW MANY TIMES??? And not only how many times but also how many times will you continue to do this just because? Okay he knows that you can cook, but does he display what he can do for you? And I’m not talking about your typical ya’ll go out on a date and he pays for the meals or he opens every door (granted these things are very much appreciated as well as… EXPECTED). But more than those things, does he keep your car sparkling clean like you do or is he quick to jump in it knowing that sucka needs washing? Does he check into the situation with the male coworker that you complain keeps pestering you at work? Does he offer suggestions to any other problems that you may complain about?

I can not exactly say what the purpose of a man is because to my knowledge, I have never been one and have not thoroughly been taught in man-ology; however, I do know the purpose of a woman. As a woman, our purpose is to birth this is why we have a womb; not only to birth future gods and goddesses but to birth ideas. Upon birthing, we nurture. We nurture that child for the nine months it is in the womb and continue to nurture our children as well as our men, family, and friends to the end of our days. And, after birthing an idea or being presented with an idea, we nurture that too. With that being said, who is to protect these creators of the earth? Well, the only other option is… OUR MEN. Correct me if I’m wrong, but it seems that their purpose would be to protect and provide for the one who births and nurtures. Makes sense to me. Does it make sense to you?

So ladies, during this dating phase, make sure you see if your man is capable of providing for and protecting you all across, diagonal, backwards, and forwards through the spectrum. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with letting him see the ways that you can indeed birth and nurture, all I’m saying is; don’t do it for free. After a few months to a year and after one time to a few of these nurturing and creative acts, you have displayed your ability to fulfill your purpose. So don’t continue to sit around and do it just because that’s what HE expects you to do. Tell him if he likes it then he needs to put a ring on it. And if he loves you, he will, if not he’ll “keep on moving, don’t stop no” but in those situations you do the same because obviously he wasn’t the one fit to put a ring on it.

(c) Enigma May 2010

Desire

Two bodies

laying in perfect harmony

desire being inhaled...

and exhaled...

because I want to be touched

by you.

Want to experience mini explosions

just from the tips

of your fingers...

magic hands

fulfilling every command

as well as commanding

me to be open

bow down

submit,

to the sensations

electrifying from the tips.

Giving my mind hour long orgasms

24 hours

7 days a week

in the knees

just from the words you speak.

So as you exhale...

I inhale the desire that I see

Because you are my mirror

Showing… me.

Got me calling on Jehovah

Just from the effects of your breath on my skin.

I want to experience more of you

So that I can see more of me.

See the beauty that I have masked with the beast

Because I did not understand who I was.

But now, it’s all getting clearer

Like looking through the glass

And in you is me.

So I want to take this experience thru the spiritual

To the physical

Because I just want to know

How far I will go

When you take me.

Manifest the thoughts that you forsee

Because I know it is real

The words the sights,

The feeling

My touch

Or yours to mine.

I don’t know how many more lines

Or how many pieces

With letters and periods

That I can use

To take up this space

Trying to replace

The longing

The need

Of you.

In me

So deep

That I lose sense of self

While touching you

Realizing that you are what you are

I am that I am

In his image

Beautiful

Peace

Harmony

Love

Intelligence

That called the stars to be...

In perfect alignment

With the planets...

Spinning

off into galaxies...

That we have yet to perceive

Yet they exist

Become

Be

When we

Call them.

And you got me calling

To the east from the west

Going so far north

That south is indistinguishable

Now combined

Into new heights

Experiences

Life.

Populating this place

Because it is in diar need of more minds

That see how we see.

And I know all of this is deep

Maybe just a tad bit crazy

Like a drill that dug to the middle of the earth

Getting inflamed

Because it was taken to much

To turn back

to the opposite,

Knowing that what was ahead

Was where it needed to be.

But,

this is how I feel.

There are not enough words to explain

Define

Try to grasp understanding within the mind

That every time I think I am finished

I am fueled with more

A smile

A gesture

Different pieces of your soul

That I must have

Taste

Devour

Desire

(c) Enigma December 2009

Evolve...Come Back

So everyone is talking about Erykah Badu's Window Seat video. I don't have much to say on that everyone can come up with their own interpretation; however, I am more concerned with the lyrics. When I listen to the song, I feel every word she says. The verses remind me of a prayer; a conversation between me and The Creator. The chorus is a dialog between us where the Creator is telling me that He needs me to want him, needs me to miss him, and I tell him I need your direction, and he tells me come back. Man that is deep ( to me anyway).

So I was listening to the song basking in sunlight, feeling good. And I got an idea for a poem. This is a very rough draft but I hope you get filled from it. It doesn't necessarily have a title but for now I'ma call it "Evolve" (because of the Evolving Tattoo on E. Badu's back). Enjoy


"Can I get a window seat?"
But unlike Ms. Badu, I want all of my people next to me.
Looking out over the clouds
From up high
The place from which our ancestors hailed.
The place where we should reside.

See I want them next to me
creating a whole
various parts
forming synergy
birthing energy;
knowledge
power
unity
to get the Original people back to the apex that they are supposed to be.

So that we can continue to evolve.

So people gather around
partake of my fruit
bathe in my light
Feed me
Cleanse me.

I want all of my brothers and sister to see
recognize
the royalty
Kings and queens

Evolving
back
to Gods and Goddesses.

So come back, becausue
I need you
to want me.
Come back
Like Ms. E Said,
clap for me.
Because we all need direction
from the Eye that sees.

Evolve.
Allowing the spiritual eye
to penetrate the physical eyes
so that we can all percieve Our greatness.

So share this window seat
evolve... with me
Come back.

(c) Enigma April 2010